One of the really fun things here in the bay area is all the things you can do for money. Yesterday, for instance, I got to play lab-rat for scientific research. Ever been a lab-rat? I thought not.
I signed up for this a few weeks ago and last week I went in for the first part, which consists of filling out paperwork and finding out what is going to happen when you actually come in for the tests. They pay $10 hour for travel time, and paperwork time, plus the bridge toll. That's about $25, and when you're not working everything helps, right?
In this case the lab work has to do with taking MRI's. They are doing neurological studies about people with chronic pain and they need controls, hence paying me and some other people like me. They need people not in pain to compare readings.
First up, MRI's don't use radiation, in case you didn't know. They expose you to a very strongmagnetic field which magnetizes some of the atoms in your body. Then it uses radio waves to systematically alter this alignment and records this alignment. (See Wikipedia article for more information, if you want. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnetic_resonance_imaging )
It can see much more than an x-ray or CT Scan, and it see's it in real time and sees changes that happen, too.
For time in the MRI machine they pay $25 hour, (again, plus $10 hour travel time and bridge tolls.)
Well, I showed up for my first scan last night. They ask you all the usual questions like, 'Are you claustrophobic,' and you fill out this questionnaire with all these negative questions on it such as, Rate how you feel: 'I don't feel any more depressed than usual,' 'I feel slightly more depressed than usual,' '...much more than usual,' etc. Then you go for the MRI.
You put anything metallic into a locker, (ooops. I forgot my belt. When he had me take it off, the magnetic field was so strong that it stood out parallel to the floor!) They had me put in two different kinds of ear plugs. The small ones you roll up and stick into your ear canal, and some other type that fill the outer ear and shape with the body heat. They warn you the machine makes a lot of noise. Then you head into the MRI.
You lay down on this little tray, not even wide enough to rest your elbows on when you are lying there. Then they clamp your head into place firmly so you don't move it. Then they put this mask over your head which holds it even stiller. It's kinda like looking out a hockey mask or something. If you are claustrophobic, you are leaving now while you still can. (Ha ha. They will let you out anytime if you want to. They give you a button to press for panic.)
Then, the tray you are on slides into the machine. It's this large round tube, so close your elbows are now supported. It is so close the top is only inches above your eyes and you slide all the way into it. Talk about getting nervous!
Now they've warned me in advance that this machine makes a variety of noises and it's quite loud. Boy, that's an understatement! As they do different types of scans it makes different kinds of noises. Lots of different kinds of noises. I tried to remember some of them.
Scans take anywhere from 2-3 minutes to 15 minutes, and it makes a specific type of noise for that particular scan. Chirp-chirp-chirp, really fast and loud for 5 minutes for one scan; whoop-whoop-whoop, for another. And movement- they didn't tell me this whole thing moves!
Did I forget to mention? You don't come out between these different scans. Oh no. You stay in here for over an hour! The machine pauses for a few seconds between scans, but, that's it.
For one scan, about 5 minutes, (five minutes in a tube inches above your face, head clamped in position, with extremely loud noises and the tray vibrating and the walls shaking is a long time,) it felt like there were two people under my 'bed.' One near my right hip and the other a little higher on my left side. The one under my right hips had a hammer and would hit the bed framework, 'Bang! Bang!' Pause, then the guy on the other side would take his impact-hammer and, 'Brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr.' Pause, and then repeat.
'Bang! Bang!' Pause, 'Brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr,' Pause, 'Bang! Bang!' Pause, 'Brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr,' Pause, 'Bang! Bang!' Pause, 'Brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr-brr.' Pause.
And the whole bed would vibrate in time to this. It felt like a construction project going on under my bed. In other cases the walls would vibrate in time to, 'whip-whip-whip-whip-whip,' or, 'chooga; chooga; chooga; chooga; chooga.'
In between individual tests he would turn on the mike and ask how I was doing. I could barely hear him, but, I had no trouble hearing the machine.
Finally, (finally!) he said the next two tests were the last and I was done. They were two 11 minute tests and both were the same. The first one was fine. The second one lasted so long I finally started counting seconds. I was sure nuclear war had happened and everyone died and I was going to be left in here forever! I kept wanting to hit the panic button, it took so long!
Then it was over.
I tried hard to describe those sounds to myself so I could remember them and share them with you. It was really difficult. There were just so many and they were so difficult to associate with anything else I've experienced that I could only remember a couple. A hammer, an impact hammer, a very loud wheel bearing chirping, a very loud wheel bearing growling, a whoop-whoop siren-type sound; God there were just so many.
I did get a stiff neck from having my head clamped in place so firmly and so long. Here it is the next morning and it’s still stiff and a little sore. Oh well. That’s life.
I go back in 10 days.
Sure is interesting being a lab-rat at the forefront of science.
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